Redemption

English: Cathedral Church of the Redemption, v...

English: Cathedral Church of the Redemption, very marvelous Church in Delhi (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I beat upon
Redemption’s door
Lamenting
Fall upon the floor
I know that I’ve
Been here before

I cry aloud
My reverie
I’m broken, yearning
To be free
I’ve bled inside
The heart of me

I use the whip
Across my back
I castigate
My fear and lack
I’m so far from
The beaten track

I beat upon
Redemption’s door
I crave the honour
I forswore
I lost the one
I might adore
I know that I’ve
Been here before

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Fire, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Inspiration

In your many words and thoughts
Your images and artistry
The wonderful diversity
Is inspiration, purity

In the myriad views of life
You portray here so well
So many tales to tell
So many fears to quell

When I dwell upon your prose
I find a synchronicity
It seems you reach the heart of me
And bleed it out in poetry

A single phrase or note inspires
A deep, abiding memory
A lost and wistful melody
A tone for this soliloquy

In your many words and thoughts
Your images and artistry
The wonderful diversity
Is inspiration, purity

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Fire, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

I Saw Him Watching Me Watching You

Shyness

Shyness (Photo credit: bernat…)

I saw him watching me watching you
All the elements came crashing through
All the meanings of glances, it’s true
So I don’t know what I should now do

In his eyes were the words he might say
In discussion with you, ‘By the way,
Did you know that you held her in sway?’
All my privacy stripped bare, away

He’s your friend and far closer than I
From afar I may ponder and try
But I’m just this girl you pass by
Who in secret may yearn yet, may sigh

Far too shy to ever approach
On your world I would never encroach
My friends all encourage and coach
But I fear your rejection, reproach

But I saw him watching me watching you
All my defences are blasted right through
So I’m at your mercy, should you
Stop to show me just what I should do.

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Poetry, Water | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Hidden Depths – for Prompt 13 – Photo Inspiration

photo credit: mindlovemisery

photo credit: mindlovemisery

We waited outside
Deathless minutes passing
Far beyond the weave of grieving
We waited

It is very true
there is no knowing
the heart of loss turning, twisting
seeking succour and compassion
in hallowed walls,
these hidden depths

The priest was ashen
Bereft of words, his shoulders slumped
as she emerged with him so much later
to the pitiless afternoon gloom
I wanted to take his hand,
to comfort him also
He, perennially required to soothe,
but beyond solace

His church, his house,
this bleeding sacred heart,
cannot fathom or encompass
such unknowable loss
Her child gone to her
To a mystery
We could not speak

We looked only to these decaying walls
as though in their stillness
they might finally,
finally let her know
what had happened to her girl
and where she rested
If she rested

No angels gathered at the doorway
or sang across the halls
We waited silent
for her resolution,
her cold and lost acceptance,
embraced her weeping,
then took her slowly,
slowly home

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

For mindlovemisery’s Prompt 13, using a photo from her own collection (posted above), so all credit to her for such a haunting photo – of course I’d choose the church of all the pictures (knowing me!) – but the story that seemed to unwind within me as I contemplated it was grim indeed (fiction, I hasten to add). Great inspiration, as you will find with all her wonderful writing at:
http://mindlovemisery.wordpress.com

Posted in Poetry, Water | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

RCC Update – Getting Closer Day by Day

English: A Picture of a eBook Español: Foto de...

English: A Picture of a eBook Español: Foto de eBook Беларуская: Фотаздымак электроннай кнігі Русский: Фотография электронной книги (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi Everyone

Just posting a brief RCC update about my upcoming novel The Seed. It’s getting closer every day to when I can confidently launch it. Lulu.com have finished their part assisting me with the paperback version (which they will publish and also distribute in that format via Amazon) and I’m waiting on word about the ebook versions that they will publish and also retail through Nook and Apple (as I understand their distribution arrangements).

I’m also waiting word on whether I can use the cover art they did for me if I publish as an ebook separately on Amazon Kindle. I thought they indicated I could as I worked with them but I may have mis-understood them – their agreement indicates possibly not. They may have meant I can publish the book anywhere, but not the cover art.  That would be a pity as it is a fabulous cover, they did a wonderful job with it, and if I publish with different cover art elsewhere it may hurt marketing and product recognition  😦

It depends on whether the relevant agreement clause only really applies to needing a new ISBN (which I already knew) or to the cover art itself. All very reasonable and understandable if so given their distribution arrangements, so I’m not complaining, but an important consideration for next steps for me. It’s an interesting question and I’ll let you know what I finally arrive at on that point when I get their specific advice/clarification. (Charles – I know this was a particular point we discussed and I received their formal distribution agreement a few days later and realised this may be a bit more complex than I thought – will let you know!!)

In the meantime I’m trying to sort out pricing decision and arrangements and so forth, which makes it all feel very, very real…exciting and scary all at once! I’m thinking over all the wise counsel of other wordpress bloggers further along this journey than me and I’m very grateful for all the advice and hints they’ve shared. 🙂

On that point, most people have written about ebook pricing – I’d be very grateful for any comments about factors to consider with print on demand paperback pricing – once you’ve allowed for production costs, retail pricing and so forth it can get quite expensive for a product by a new author so advice is very, very welcome!!!

In any case I hope my next update has a cover reveal, more on the book, and details on how to purchase – if you are so inclined – at least via lulu at first. My aim is to launch at the beginning of August at the latest, so wish me luck!!

Cheers Helen

Posted in Conversation, Fire | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 30 Comments

Kingmaker

Warwick the Kingmaker

Warwick the Kingmaker (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

To be the kingmaker
Rather than the king
That’s the thing!

Powerbroker plays
Are the ones that pay
In so many ways

Giving your advice
Never asking twice
Trap them in their vice

Spider web refined
Competitors confined
Proteges that shine

All these ones that owe
From your gifts bestowed
See the tributes flow

Hidden from the eye
None make seek or pry
No matter how they try

Shielded from the blame
For this ruthless game
Those lost to the flame

To be the kingmaker
Rather than the king
That’s the thing!

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Fire, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Wish Upon

Wandering After Will-O'-The-Wisp

Wandering After Will-O’-The-Wisp (Photo credit: garlandcannon)

Light shadows cross my vision
Photogenic spirits
Near ectoplasmic form
Bright pinpoint phosphorescence
Repeating blinking
Until dawn

Daemons draw blood sustenance
Winking just outside of view
Are these days, weeks, months
True memories
Or just a story stumbled through?

Body that is formless
Arms outstretched on this precipice
None to hold back
Willing deep descent
None to counsel to think twice

Light shadows will o the wisp
Momentarily seen
Then eternally gone
The stars above
Have already died
At least the ones I wish upon

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Falling To The Floor

The penitent

The penitent (Photo credit: Stitch)

Suspended in this cold hereafter
Robbed of sight, of sound, of laughter
Brooding, waiting for a sign from others
Passing here before
In such caverns, thoughts residing
Ancient gods are here presiding
Weighing sins to find me wanting,
Falling to the floor

In my life so quickly lost now
All my choices made me somehow
Lesser than the person that I would
Have thought before
Are our sins so pure and pressing
No forgiveness and no blessing
Saves us from our lost confessing, cutting
To the core?

Hear my bitter truth while living
Less of greed and more of giving
May be all it takes to lift you, up above
This dirty floor
If your heart can heed this calling
Then escape this awful falling
Lost and broken, far past hope now
Crashing to the floor

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All rights Reserved

This is a bit of an homage to Edgar Allen Poe’s The Raven, which I love for its haunting quality and unusual rhyming pattern which I’ve partially approximated here.

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Holy Grail

English: 'The Quest of the Holy Grail'

English: ‘The Quest of the Holy Grail’ (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

And would we fall before
The Holy Grail
And would we fall?
Would we recognise
A moment’s purity
Would we recognise?

Each day travelled in
The modern world
Seems travesty
Were my spirit and
My honor bound
What’s left to me?
When the sins of ages
Only garner
Publicity?

And would we fall before
The Holy Grail
And would we fall?

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

White Death

into the great wild whiteness # 1

into the great wild whiteness # 1 (Photo credit: askal bosch)

White death arrives
As snow upon a desert sand
And purity is sterility
Cold porcelain and age

White death arrives
Blizzard across aching bones
All these many years
Forfeit to an icy hand

White death arrives
Encompassing all colour
Talisman against the void
That echoes eternal blackness

White death arrives
No angels carry molten light
Just merging of the one to all
In endless, pale terrain

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments