helenvalentina

The BA

Posted on April 11, 2013 by Helen

Graduated! (Photo credit: ralph and jenny)

Sometimes as I peruse
My workplace budget
Some strange delight
Suggests I am a frustrated accountant

Other times when navigating
Complex and intense
Interpersonal conversation
A little thrill
Suggests a frustrated psychologist instead

Sometimes as I ponder
The abstract and often absurd
Arguments of office politics
A peculiar intensity
Suggests I’m a frustrated philosopher at heart

In the end it seems
I’m a cautionary tale
Of academic pursuit and origins
A Bachelor of Arts
Who at best epitomizes
Career confusion
Years of divine discontent
And a constant sense of distance
From vocational identity.

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged accountancy, Aspiration, Bachelor of Arts, career, confusion, Humor, Philosophy, Psychology, truth, vocation | 17 Comments

Self Delusion – Sonnet

Posted on April 11, 2013 by Helen

Within my mind I know that tricks may lie
To catch me unaware with my belief
To be more self-aware I always try
To know when I’d cause happiness or grief
And yet when I feel fear I often find
I shrink before a truth so coldly shown
It seems I make some choice to err as blind
To keep such deep disturbance still unknown
Is it the truth that all of us will hide
From evidence that pinches at our pride?
We re-arrange such truths that we would see
And so from self-delusion can’t be free?

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged dark, delusion, denial, fear, Philosophy, self awareness, sonnet, truth | 16 Comments

A Child Will Know

Posted on April 10, 2013 by Helen

Sad child. (Photo credit: apdk)

A child will see
The lesser turned head
The more distant eye
The favour fall elsewhere

A child will know
In offhand remarks
Those words left unspoken
Indifferent silence

A child will feel
The ephemeral embrace
That speaks not of care
But impatient distraction

A child will remember
In the sinews of their heart
The lesser depth of smile
Or softness of words

A child will carry
Any churlish critique
And the paucity of praise
In the guise of response

All the while the child
Internally has bled
But knows that the cause
Is best left unsaid.

Posted in Poetry, Water | Tagged child, Childcare, dark, denial, emotional neglect, growing, Love, Relationships, truth | 32 Comments

Early Morning Walk

Posted on April 10, 2013 by Helen

Weary eyes
fight to stay open,
defeat sleep

Longest days
Dark in the morning
draws us out

Streetlights shine
Even at 6am
step by step

Remember
comfort of your bed
left behind

Do not sleep
even as you walk
comatose

Dangers hide
even at the dawn
Stay alert!

Posted in Earth, Poetry | Tagged acceptance, dark, dawn, Musings, walking, weariness | 17 Comments

Knowledge

Posted on April 9, 2013 by Helen

I know you think
I believe you
I know you are counting
On my trust
I know you believe
I’ll support you
I know you think
That I must

Do you see I know
Not to trust you
Do you even sense
My word’s not true?
Do you realise
I’ve seen through this
Do you see how much
I know you?

Posted in Fire, Poetry | Tagged dark, denial, knowledge, loyalty, trust, truth | 14 Comments

Ink

Posted on April 9, 2013 by Helen

Back tattoo (Photo credit: The Pug Father)

Etched on skin
Ageless narratives
Symbols and signs
Personal canvas
Faded by time
Testament to
The artistry of pain
And the pain of artistry
Exotic creatures
Like from another land
Or galaxy
So intriguing
Living their truth
In riotous ink

Posted in Fire, Poetry | Tagged acceptance, art, artistry, Aspiration, Ink, narrative, Tattoo, truth | 15 Comments

Memory

Posted on April 8, 2013 by Helen

Crystalline light
refracts before tired eyes
Do I know this place?
So strange to not
trust familiarity
It may be illusory
cosmetic, or real
All the same now

I do not know

Words used to flow
like rivers from my lips
Loquacious, they called me
Lyrical at times
But now words are stilled
stopped up
like a dam
Too often lost
Captured in this dark forest
in the depths of a night
even while the sun
filters its light upon me

I do not see

So gradual
this steep, inexorable decline
When I remember
all I have lost
this bids me cry

I do not feel

Age is a monster
hiding in the cupboard
dusty with moths
like my mind
with memories out of reach
Oh Death!
Will I recognize your embrace
the moment that you visit
or will your face
be yet another stranger to me know?

I do not remember
Dear God
I cannot recall………

Posted in Air, Poetry | Tagged age, Brain, cruelty, dark, dementia, loss, memory, Memory loss, Musings, truth | 16 Comments

I Wish For You

Posted on April 8, 2013 by Helen

I wish for you
a sense of self
that wraps you warm
and calm
I wish that here
good friends abound
And none to do
you harm
I wish for love
to find your door
That you may let
it in
And if you choose
to now compete
I wish that you
will win

I wish the words
a lover speaks
or writes will
hold you dear
I wish that all
the friends you need
are ever true
and near
I wish success
and just rewards
follow all
you do
And when they call
the victory march
I hope they call
for you