Prompt 7 – Nonsense Madness – Sixteen


Fly (Photo credit: Jim, the Photographer)

Sixteen days, sixteen hours,
Sixteen minutes
I saw sixteen flies
Around the carcass
What did you say?
Oh, you think
You’re very clever then
One plus six is seven
All good children go to heaven
Cosmic jokesters all of you!

There’s nothing heavenly about that death
That stinking thing
On the road
Spreadeagled like a promise
Of the pit
The flies know
The flies
All sixteen little soldiers
Of their dark little lord
They know

I know
I’ve known for days
Does it make you satisfied?
Sick to my stomach and I can’t eat
Can barely think
But I can count
You didn’t count on that, did you?
You think I don’t count
Ha! Did you get that? Did you understand?
You think I just..don’t count

But I’m counting
I’m counting backwards, all this time….

When I was sixteen
A dark little man
Took me by the hand
Now it’s all just death and debris
All the flowers
Sixteen little lilies
That he stole from me
And they think I don’t remember

I bit off all my fingernails
They bleed at the quick
The salty taste of blood
Like a familiar friend
Sixteen days, sixteen hours
Far more than sixteen years
I know they’re coming for me
Coming for me in the end……

I’m counting on it….

(c) Helen Valentina 2013, All Rights Reserved

For mindlovemisery’s prompt 7 – at Β – one of the options was to write as though one was mad/insane, so I gave that a go…hopefully it worked! πŸ™‚

About Helen

I'm drawn to blogging as a way to share ideas and consider what makes us who we are. Whether it's in our working life or our creativity, expression is a means to connect.
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29 Responses to Prompt 7 – Nonsense Madness – Sixteen

  1. I love this Helen you absolutely achieved the goal! A brilliantly mad poem

  2. feralc4t says:

    “A dark little man
    Took me by the hand”
    Yep, that’s freaky..

  3. Oh my word! I wish you had that disclaimer in the beginning. I felt horribly for you that you lost your mind and all. Great job, Helen!

  4. Brian Hughes says:

    I write as though I’m insane all the time, because officially I am classified as insane. Then again, if the world is meant to be sane, then I’m glad I’m not.

    • Well I see a lot of humour, and perception and wisdom in your writing…if that comes from insanity then so be it, they say a lot of truly creative people are a bit mad. πŸ™‚

  5. Yeah it worked. Worked well.

  6. ksbeth says:

    wow my head is spinning and i must sit on the floor to regain my balance after reading this one )

  7. SSMatthews says:

    delightful and fun

  8. jser67 says:

    There should NEVER be 13 comments (or anything else- LOL) Sixteen was perhaps the worst year in my teens. I like the playful way you seem to be mocking yourself- you seem to have fun writing (or maybe I just would like to think that. Another great write.

    • It was fun to write in a way…exploring madness gives a certain license really…you can really say anything and the more odd or out there it is the more it works as a portrait of insanity. πŸ™‚ But I should note on another level that I do not mean to mock insanity, it’s a very tragic way to exist – I meant only to try to portray it. πŸ™‚

  9. gs batty says:

    mad mad mad..delightfully mad

  10. hypercryptical says:

    Oh wonderfully brilliantly delightfully mad! Brilliant close!

    Anna :o]

  11. David King says:

    It’s fun and it’s screwy — and it makes a kinda sense…. brilliant!

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